Please, I Cannot Compile This Spreadsheet, For I Am A Smooth-Skinned Goatherd
a modern Pastoral
Make me a spreadsheet for work
I cannot do this thing…my cheeks are of such a flush from the Alpenglow
I have a red cotton shawl in which I keep my simple cheese, from my village
My beautiful village, which I love, up in the mountains
Please, my goats…
Coffee time at work
No coffee…let us kneel beside the coldest spring and drink as the goats do…the goats are my responsibility, given to me by the King
People gossip so, in Poschiavo…I prefer the company of the goats, and for this even the goose-boy Torvald laughs at me
The Queen’s beautiful daughter has been missing for many years…the princess’ horse was called Tachëbrun, and could speak
My goats have ascended to the highest peak in the Pitz Palu, my attitude towards nature is Humble
Now is a meeting
No…now is a small potato, baking in the ashes
All times are now to a goat
I must rub goats’ milk onto my tender skin, for my beauty
You are late!!
I have my slippers, my shawl-cheese, my tunic, my goat-staff…my flock...the hills for my goats to browse and sluice…the songs of the nightingale and the lark…
You are built to envious show!! Grudged at and grudging, lanternless tale-teller! I throw my pebbles at you, from my sling, with my noble arm, to gaze upon my noble arm!
My true master is Dionysus, whose wand drips with honey and whose grapes bring god-madness
I do not tend to pigs…such work is for the pig-boy, whose skin is washed with pigs’ milk and cannot compare in either lustre or brilliance to mine…
Here is an email for you to answer
My hair is fragrant with fennel and grape leaves
I must pipe a while, I must play on my pipes to the delight of my goats and their sisters the hill-dryads
the free mountain air has filled my face with beauty…many kings are desirous of my simple outdoor beauty
I sleep in a field of flax and carry a long iron fork, for toasting bread….the fir trees will protect me from your fits of email
the brown one with white spots I call Bränli
Begone, landlord…never again will I dwell at court
part of me wants to share this with my coworkers as well all toil away in our respective homes... but in my doing so I would confirm Too Much...
Excuse me as I change into my simple linen dress and shawl to go for a meditative walk in the early morning mist. The landscape is barren, like my soul.