Previously in this series: Dirtbag Catullus and More Catullus.
My new thing is infinite resignation. I’m extremely reserved now, and just, I hold everything loosely, because anyone who has lost as much as I have (my girlfriend but also just, like,
the very concept of personal fulfillment, which is fine, because
I can accept it)
Was I once happy and dwelt among the sunlit lands? Okay, yes,
And was my girlfriend loved as no one ever loved a girlfriend, like, ever?
Also a yes there, Chief,
but sometimes people get tired of happiness, I guess,
and if she doesn’t want to dwell in the highest form of bliss
available to mortals, then who am I to defy Fate?
my new thing is being a beacon of stoicism and endurance,
and closing myself off to all love and forms of consolation,
and people say things like, “Oh wow, is Catullus completely closed off to sweetheartism now? Who hurt him? and why? We should have appreciated him when we had the chance.”
[Recently broken up with] Veranius!!! My friend!
My better than friend, my better than three hundred thousand friends,
Recently I’ve been made aware that friendship is the only thing that matters.
Are you really home for good? Did your mother cry when you came in? Your wonderful mother, old as kitchens, full of bread and fire, weeping brothers just to see you —
this is the only newspaper I’ve ever read. I want to hear everything. Spare no details. The trip to Iberia, arriving at Iberia, everyone you met in Iberia, how they write and send letters in Iberia,
I just want to sit on the floor in your kitchen, eating muffins with your brothers, listening to you talk about your vacation. Because friendship is the only thing that matters. Please, may I kiss your neck and eyes? I’ve never been happier than I am right now. From now on I am 100% laser-focused and dedicated only to friendship. No distractions. Can you bring your neck a little closer? Thanks!
Also can I please stay over tonight
I already asked your mother and she says it’s fine
She says she doesn’t think there’s any reason for me to ever go home.
Catullus 10
I never said your girl was either charming or attractive, Varus,
I said that, as far as your lovers go (which is plenty far enough, ha ha),
she was not really uncharming. Not unattractive. There’s a world of difference (not that I’d expect you to know it) between a charming, attractive girl who happens to do it for money, and the sort you go out with. What I mean is I wouldn’t bother to change my seat at table to get away from her, but please don’t mistake that for a compliment to your taste or hers.
