May Queen:

• Always capers at the front of the parade by herself

• Almost no bounty to share, unless you count wreaths and flower crowns

• Hope you like weaving garlands because sister that’s about all she’s good for

• Maybe a bonfire if you’re lucky

• It’s unlucky for her to carry anything herself, and you’d better believe she’s ready to milk that for all it’s worth

• “The traditions must be kept alive”

• Winter provisions all eaten but none of the crops have yet reached full height so dinner-wise you’re looking at rabbits and berries, at best for the next month

• Plus you have to leave like a third of the rabbits and berries out for the aos sí too

• “I said, ‘Pretty maiden, may I go with you,
  Through the flowers to gather some May?’
  The maid she replied, ‘My path it is here,
  I pray you pursue your own way.’”

• Walpurgis Night means culling

• Blood must flow

• Half the town still away on pilgrimage from April so it doesn’t even feel like a party

• Any time you do get off work is spent scrubbing door frames and fence-gates anyway

• Doesn’t go anywhere without like fifteen other girls dressed exactly like her

• What does she even do, exactly?

• Seems fake idk

• I’m not a prude but there’s something a little unsettling about fertility rituals and group sex under like the full noon sunlight

• Too-tight hairstyle, white smocks, dresses like a milkmaid, kills people

Harvest Queen:

• Gives rides to anyone who can catch up with the winnowing-cart

• Always sharing bounty, basket overflowing with apples and sheafs of wheat, edible crown of vine leaves with grapes still attached

• Winnowing cart also fully laden

• Special leather pouch tied to her hips full of silver coins

• Rides in the middle of the parade so everyone gets a chance

• Extra bread

• “Come and sit by my side, child!”

• A foaming glass of nut-brown ale for all, from the smallest apple-cheeked lad to the clockmaker’s grandfather, and raspberry cordial for every traveler who stops by the inn

• “Merry, merry, merry, cheery, cheery, cheery
  Trowel the black blow to me;
  Hey derry, derry, with a pop and a lorry,
  I’ll throw it again to thee.’”

• Exemplifies work hard, play hard

• Oh, brother! Mother has made such a plum cake! Have you ever heard of such bounty?

• Flattering mood lighting from autumn sunsets, flickering torches

• Loose hair, flowing dresses, stout walking boots, sexy but approachable/comfortable

• Doesn’t kill anybody, always nice to me, down to earth

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