I have only ever given one piece of universal advice, which is that if you are ever offered your choice of a beverage during a job interview, you should take it, because whether or not you are offered the job will never depend upon your not having imposed upon the office manager for getting you a cup of coffee. It’s a free drink! You should take it. After years of careful consideration, I would like to add a second piece, bringing the total of absolute truths I’m aware of to exactly two: If you travel any distance – even merely outside the city limits of your hometown – you must be prepared to meet an Australian person. I will develop this further: You must prepare yourself for an Australian person to talk to you, to offer only the vaguest background information as to why they are so far from Australia, and to have no discernible occupation or plans to return to their home country. In my admittedly limited travel experience, from which I am prepared to extrapolate wildly, all Australian people are on vacation an average of 400 days a year, and prefer to spend that time talking to Americans about carpentry, their future travel plans, national monuments, and the supplement/fake cold remedy Emergen-C. If you have ever filled a Ziploc baggie with multivitamins in preparation for a trip, you have just upped the odds of running into your Australian. I don’t make the rules, I just work here.
This advice also applies for Australians meeting other Australians on the road, strangely enough.
Our Australian treated us to a disquisition about international exchange rates in the ruins of Pompeii.
As an Australian I promise to unlearn the guitar immediately. Thank you for your concern.
Me, an australian: Danny, this is probably accurate, I'll give you that. However, now that you've mentioned healthcare...
I can confirm as an Australian and a traveller that the impression of
plentiful Australians is increased by how obviously Australian we usually
are.
Also New Zealanders.
I will keep my own council about travellers from the US.
"The Australian will have a baffling energy that is somehow both sexual and
non-sexual at the same time."
How is this piece so incredibly accurate?! Except that hostels have to be
>100% increase. The alligator wants to eat the larger number. This piece
has caused me to invent a probably-not-new portmanteau which is
'glorigeous.'
I like a word with several vowels in a row. Now I will stop procrastinating
and actually change my flat tire.
Wait, is Radiohead controversial in America? This worries me.
❤
And I laughed really really hard.
And I really needed to today.
I hope you are well!