223 Comments
Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

hi, gang - grace here - just wanted to say thanks for the good wishes; I'm hanging in and Danny is a really skilled and loving caregiver. lucky to have such a husband - and grateful to all of you for saying hi xoxo

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love you bb girl

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you too wonderone

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feel better Grace!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I'm rewatching Salt Fat Acid Heat because Samin Nosrat's wamth and palpable joy is so comforting right now and it's distracting me from worrying the immune compromised people in my life.

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I would do ANYTHING for her focaccia right now. You are making such a good choice!

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If I didn't have celiac I would already be making it!

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If you ever do figure it out let me know! I've been celiac since I was a toddler so I've never experienced focaccia and it seems quite wonderful.

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I also have celiacs and I love nothing more than watching gluten-full food content like Great british bake off lol

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Perhaps try the foccacia recipe in Gluten Free Baking Classics by Annalise Roberts? I haven't made that particular recipe, but everything in that cookbook is reliably good. (If it's possible to post images here, I can share it if anyone is interested.)

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For anyone who doesn't have Netflix (or is a Samin Nosrat completist), there's a Bon Appetit YouTube video where she makes foccacia with Brad, and it is PURE JOY. (Also, can we put links in comments here?)

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Try the Bon Appetit "Shockingly Easy No-Knead Focaccia." I am an idiot at yeasted doughs and have had repeated success with it.

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AS WE SPEAK my boyfriend is in the kitchen mixing stuff up so we can have her buttermilk chicken tonight! Rewatching the show seems like a brilliant idea

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On Insta, Samin said they are kind a podcast or something about cooking during this time.

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*making a podcast

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Her book was what got me into cooking as a hobby, and tbh the promise of cooking delicious things at home is one of the silver linings I'm currently clinging to now that i'm social distancing and working remote from home. I love her!

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I love this idea. I need some Samin in my life.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I feel like we need to accept that it's time to rewatch American Vandal as a group

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YES

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i rewatched the entirety of season 1 in like a 36 hour span this weekend....... will prob keep doing that until this is over

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IN

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Yes *please*

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I need...emotional upliftment? I had a terrible 2019, and was stuck indoors much of winter 2019-2020, and now with the added push for social distancing, I feel a bit stir crazy. A lot of my social and emotional needs have not been met in the last year or so and I feel very volatile and sad and like nothing will get better.

On a brighter note, I am able to work 100% from home and I have everything that I need materially. I'm grateful for this, just wish I had others to share it with.

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PhD student solidarity! I was just talking with another one of us about how this really exacerbates all of the worst aspects of grad school for mental health. She pointed out that at least we're all going through it together, so everyone is hungry for social contact.

My plan is to alternate doing work with reaching out to the people I haven't talked to in ages and always mean to. Normally I would worry that I'll somehow be a bother, but right now you can be pretty much sure that everyone will be excited to have someone to talk to (possibly with a moratorium or time limit on topics that will only stress you both out more).

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Extremely relatable! I had a failed surgery at the beginning of 2019 that has limited my mobility, and juuuuusssst had a second surgery last week. Happy to chat here or elsewhere, and to provide cat pics, as well. We got this, we're pros. :muscle emoji:

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Me too... I have surgery this week that they havent canceled, but I hope I get my mobility back. Let's all hope the cats keep us strong.

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Wow it sounds like you're in precisely the same boat as me - PhD+job and all. I think the thing that's kind of kept me tethered is the knowledge that this set of circumstances will also change - just as circumstances changed to get me to the place where 2019 was Fucking Rough. We aren't going to be like this forever, AC! It'll definitely change, and meanwhile your main job is to be super nice and gentle to yourself in whatever way you can.

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Are you able to go outside? Avoiding crowded places doesn't mean you can't take walks, go to a park, etc! I've been making it a priority to go outside every day and it's really helpful for my mental health.

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I'm so sorry to hear that! Cabin fever is a huge Thing with me. What do you do on your own for fun?

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Yoga, TV and reading. I'm also a PhD student - so in many ways, my lifestyle hasn't changed, it's just that...one likes to have the option of doing fun things outside.

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Fellow PhD hi-5!! (I'm defending my dissertation this Wednesday so in all likelihood further along than you but still.) Echoing the above commenter's suggestion to be nice to yourself any way you can - one thing I have found helpful in absence of actually leaving the house is opening the windows, sometimes just hearing people on the street helps.

Not sure how other commenters feel about this, but I have been leaving the house... to take walks in the park. The main thing for me is avoiding public transport and other crowded spaces, and to maintain a respectable distance of six feet from others at all times. (The city where I live isn't super dense so YMMV)

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I would feel fine going outside, as long as you aren't near people or touching things other people will touch.

Congrats on being so close to defending! That's so exciting.

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Good luck on your defense!! I'm defending in the fall.

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I think going out for walks is perfectly fine and a healthy thing to do! I'm wishing that the weather in Minnesota would warm up so we could enjoy some time outdoors... it's currently snowing.

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Good luck with your defence!

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Thank you! (Just repeating what other people have said already but... PhDs are rough and I definitely considered dropping out at various points. You will be ok!)

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Congrats and good luck on your defense!

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Thank you!

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I heard also figured I was already mostly self isolated by my remote work, but knowing you *can't* leave is truly a whole different level. Do you have a favorite yoga instruction or are you able to lead yourself? I've been following YogaInMelbourne on YouTube because she is so chill and her rooms are so pretty.

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ooh I'm gonna check YogaInMelbourne out thanks!

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When double checking, I realized I've been misreading it for months! YoginiMelbourne

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PhD love from the Netherlands <3

I've been working from home for the past few weeks already (whee weak immune system), and definitely have been having trouble concentrating more than normal.

What are you researching?

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

My last trip out into the word before social isolation was to go pick up your new book at our local bookstore! Something That May Shock & Discredit You is keeping me company today. :)

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That means so much to me -- thank you. I hope you have a wonderful time reading it!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I was hooked from the first chapter! Childhood rapture fear is so real 😳

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I bought it the day after it came out and have been reading it in chunks. My friends will probably be grateful when I finish reading it so I'll stop going "Listen—stop what you're doing—DIRTBAG SAPPHO"

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I share the same sentiment as Linnea! I just got my copy of your book, and it is a delight from page to page.

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I picked it up at your event at the Strand, read it, loved it, and sent it along with my roommate when she went to her fiance's to ride this out, and they are both very excited to read it and be beautifully distracted from coronavirus news.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I started reading your book last night when I couldn't sleep so I could have feelings about gender instead of anxiety about pandemics. The book is very good and it was the right choice.

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You are going to LOVE IT. Book of the year. I am not biased at all. But also I have loved all of Danny's books and this is my favourite.

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I just finished it yesterday — you’ll love it!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I had to make the hard decision to cancel an event I'd spent a year planning. It was going to be really rad and queer and a lot of people were excited for it. I know we made the right choice, but we're still mourning it.

Otherwise, I'm finding myself surprisingly well-equipped to deal with this, having been isolated and holed up a lot these past few years. I'm organizing a remote skillshare with my friends and making opportunities for creative types to share their work and collaborate. If anyone wants to hang out and make things, I can send you a link to our Discord server.

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That really sucks. I'm sorry. Thinking of you and hope you end up getting to do it again down the road.

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Yay! I sent you a friend request. Or you can just use this link: https://discord.gg/hFykHr

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Both my partner and I have been fired by our jobs in light of everything happening and we’re kind of worried about money to be frank. Planning on spending the day applying for unemployment, watching Miss Fisher’s Murder mysteries and trying to stay positive about not having any income at the moment

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My partner and I are so touched with every one that’s sent us a little help! They wanted to let you all know that if you ever are in LA, elbow bumps and free coffee are yours!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I do, thank you! ❤️My Venmo is badfolklorist

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Yeah it was kind of a wild day when we both found out. We’re trying to stay strong, and hope that things go back to normal once things calm down a bit. Do you know LA, the grind never ends

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I'm rewatching Gilmore Girls and mapping all the characters on an X/Y quadrant of narcissistic personality disorder and early 2000s charm. Any other old TV suggestions?

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The O.C.!

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Veronica Mars?

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I mean, always, always Buffy. Or Pushibg Daisies!

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Buffy has been my drug of choice.

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Pushing Daisies was such a good TV show

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Sabrina the Teenage Witch (the one from the 90s! Say hi to Aunt Science Bae, Zelda)

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Salem!

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Sex and the City! Especially as you enjoy mapping character flaws!

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Anybody else remember the show Popular? Not sure if it would hold up but some of the actresses (Leslie Bibb, Sara Rue) popped up on this guilty pleasure show American Housewife that has become my bingey background friend. I remember this one line so clearly--Leslie said Sara couldn't be a cheerleader "BECAUSE...YOU'RE...FAT."

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Yes! I am still haunted by this show’s emphasis on being “a perfect size 2” and so thin that other girls covet your visible hip bones.

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It had a terrible theme song too--terrible in a very literal, L Word theme song kinda way where they lay out all the themes of the show. Something about "what matters most in life: character, or rock hard thighs?" - it pops into my head every now & then. I'm not gonna YouTube it, want it to float around my brain as unresolved idle curiosity until I see the show again.

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Friends! Grey's Anatomy!

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would love to see your results- this sounds fun

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The X-Files is a treasure trove of personality disorders.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Hey hey! First of all, do you and Grace need anything? Hope you're both holding up well. 💜

I was Very Sad on Saturday when my library announced we were closing to the public. Not because I don't agree that was a wise and important choice! More because kids stuck at home, and their caregivers, maybe need my Children's Room more than ever right now. We also have a lot of families who rely on the library for internet and printer access (so streaming something fun probably isn't a way they're able to cope with being homebound), and some who use it as a safe place to shelter themselves and their children during the day because they are homeless. So far we're only closing for two weeks, and I'm really hoping the "essential staff" who are still clocking in will be able to use that time to identify safe ways we can maybe open our doors back up and provide some support to folks soon.

But! A thing that is making me feel better is that a mom I regularly babysit for and a friend of hers have asked me to sit for their kids over the next couple weeks. They're both single moms in small apartments who need to work from home for the foreseeable future, so they had been feeling panicky about how they were going to do their parenting and professional work at the same time every day now that schools have closed. My sitting for both of their children means that they can split my regular rate for two kids, which makes that childcare affordable to them when it wouldn't be otherwise. So I'm feeling really grateful both that I can offer them some caregiving backup and that I'll still...kind of get to do my job every day? Still keeping kids safe and engaging their imaginations, just in a different way.

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That's so kind of you. We're doing well for now; I'm able to run out quickly to shops for things we need, and we have enough money coming in from our day jobs that we can absorb the loss of fees from book sales and speaking engagements without worrying that we can't pay our bills. I just hope I don't get it next -- my fear is that we'll both be sick at the same time.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Oof, I hear you. But I'm so glad that things are manageable. Sending lots of healing thoughts to Grace and Immune System Fortification thoughts to you!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

If anyone is looking for yoga AND a way to help someone in need, Emily Joy (who started #ChurchToo) is teaching yoga via Instagram stories this week. Emily and her partner (and heir dog!) lost their home in Nashville during the tornado, so while her yoga class will be free, she'll have her venmo listed. Here's her instagram for more: https://www.instagram.com/emilyjoypoetry/

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Thanks for sharing this!!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

If anyone wants/ needs a tarot reading via video chat, about the current *gestures grimly* or about whatever, I would love to do that for folks. I have the Scary Cough and a job that can't be worked remotely so I am free... constantly.

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I'd love a Tarot reading! Can I venmo you for it?

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

absolutely! email me at jamiebeckenstein [at] gmail and we can pick a video format

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sent!!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I'm going to just start randomly calling friends on the phone because why not.

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call me later!! I'm off work at 2!

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Nothing's shocking

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I hope grace feels better asap! Let me know if you need anything. We’re okay. I’ve got a gross stomach bug & my kids’ school is closed for the foreseeable future so I am deeply reliant on Disney+ rn and throwing the notion of getting work done out the window. my husband is newly a staff union rep for the hospital he used to work at here in Philly, which is chaotic at the moment lol. it’s a bit of a shit show but we’re getting through. Thanks for doing this. <3

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oh I'm so glad to hear you're doing okay, and I hope the kids are finding Disney+ etc to be HYPNOTICALLY INTERESTING

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Oh no! My best to you and Grace for her recovery. I also am confined to my home, albeit as a preventative measure, following an unluckily timed sojourn to Europe. No regrets - I caught up with a dear friend I haven’t seen in years, and was most pleased to find that she makes an excellent travel companion in addition to an excellent friend - but I had a rather stressful day on Thursday, when I decided that it was Time To Go, and then ended up stuck on a train for five hours (three! hours! longer! than the journey should have taken), followed by several hours on hold with my airline to rearrange my return flights.

I’m relaxing by watching Nigella Lawson on DVD, whose benignly joyful energy is just what I need right now. Currently she’s making a cauliflower and chickpea salad with harissa, which I’m sure I’ll be making at some point once I’m allowed to go to the shops again 😂

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Hopefully Grace does not have other underlying conditions and she will get better quickly. Thanks for the shout out to everyone and the link to the SWC below. I'm thinking its time to reread my favorite novel "100 Years of Solitude" for the 37th time...magical realism may be apropos right now.

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Based on how many copies I've sold at my bookstore in the last week, Gabriel Garcia Marquez is having a moment. Especially Love in the Time of Cholera, I alone checked out at least 5 customers buying it. Very fitting, for certain temperaments (not mine, I'm avoiding all plague-y literature for the moment)

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Very interesting!! I can understand the reluctance to read LTC. Marquez is so mesmerizing that I find myself living out the narratives as I read them.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Danny, you're a delight, and I hope Grace recovers soon!

My spouse and I just moved 3000 miles for an airline job, a decision which, in light of current events, is looking...questionable.

BUT I'm here to share the one thing that's lightening my day today, which is this nytimes rainbow sprinkle cake recipe: https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1018364-rainbow-sprinkle-cake?em_pos=medium&emc=edit_ck_20170326&nl=cooking&nlid=75870329&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI88mNsKCf6AIVyiCtBh3sqwFbEAAYASAAEgJdq_D_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

(Here's an unaltered non-paywall version: http://diana212m.blogspot.com/2018/03/yay-its-wednesday-cake.html)

It's been popping up in my newsfeed for weeks now, and that pic got the better of my isolation brain. As soon as I unpack our baking stuff, it's fancy funfetti time!!! Advertising works people.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Someone shared this NYC based info/aid list if anyone wants: https://docs.google.com/document/d/18WYGoVlJuXYc3QFN1RABnARZlwDG3aLQsnNokl1KhZQ/preview

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

just did yoga (out of boredom), tired of wrestling with fucking blackboard, and I need to work on writing a grant but I JUST DON'T WANT TO. That about sums things up.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Danny, you're a continual joy in my inbox, just, in general and so you know.

In what might be the worst timing on Earth, I got fired about a week ago. If anyone has anything to spare, my Venmo is @the28dogs. I'm hoping to get set up on unemployment soon, but this is a very scary time to be without health insurance.

In much lighter news, I started Godless yesterday and am obsessed - Jeff Daniels as a traumatized, bloodthirsty Mormon! Lady Mary! Merritt Wever wearing men's clothes and kissing girls!

I'm also into season 3 of my first-ever watch of The Sopranos, if anyone wants to chat about the absolute perfection of Edie Falco as Carmella.

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Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you get on unemployment soon, and in the meantime thank you for sharing your Venmo.

And Edie!! SHE KILLS ME!

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At least once an episode I point at the TV and yell, "LOOK AT HER FACE!!" Because it's just so...much!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Food banks in the bay area (and I would think nationally, though I don't have data) are in dire need of volunteers who are not symptomatic to help prep and deliver groceries.

As more and more people are homebound, those who typically go to food pantries or public schools for their meals have a whole new obstacle to contend with.

https://www.sfmfoodbank.org/volunteer/

https://www.accfb.org/volunteering/

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I'm a final-year college student in the UK- we've had no information from the university administration about how we'll be examined or whether next term were happen, people are being randomly evicted, it's chaos. If anyone knows of ways to help people in isolation for those who don't have a lot of money to donate/ways to support those who are quarantined alone, it would be great to be able to do something. Much love to you and Grace; your writing has been a light for me.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Thanks, Danny. Just want to say that you’re a light in the world and I’m thankful for you. 💝 Hanging in there with the kids, going on a walk in a few minutes.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

I don't have a... Great relationship with my parents and was working to get out of this house when, uh, all this happened. So.

Upshot is I'm always anxious anyway so it's finally my time to shine, baby.

What else. I finished reading WicDiv. Anyone watch Joe Pera Talks With You? I think it might be one of my favorite shows now.

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Joe Pera is SO soothing!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Hi Danny! I wish Grace a fast recovery and would love to hear what tv you are watching.

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The Sopranos, for the FIRST TIME!

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I am very excited to read anything you write about The Sopranos!

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Enjoy the ride!

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

Three parts anxiety--one for the coming medical capacity crisis, one for lack of guidance from my job about what we're going to do (I'm a public defender, so just waiting for New York courts to get their act together), and one part guilt about going outside a few times in the past two days.

I'm not generally an anxious person. This is hard!

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I know it's a very dry thing but I have a pro Zoom account through work and can set up virtual recurring film clubs, book clubs, stitch n bitch, etc if anyone has suggestions, ideas, or requests. Most likely going to set up movie watching and Friday night shabbat at the very least.

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I’d love to join virtual Shabbat! ( I like the irony in running it through the computer)

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I would be down for that too

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What are we all cooking while stuck at home? I am planning on these sour cream biscuits (https://www.bonappetit.com/recipe/sour-cream-and-onion-biscuits) and a lot of beans simmered very gently for a long time, and my partner is currently making granola.

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My family recently discovered the glories of homemade broth and are never going back. It sounds so extra, but it makes everything that requires broth infinitely better. We're using an instant pot so it doesn't have to simmer for like eight hours. Highly recommend for all your homemade soup needs!

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You know my mom just shared that recipe with me?? Maybe this is a Sign.

I think today I might make some Udon noodles. They only require water/flour/salt and you put the dough in a plastic bag and stomp on it with your feet. Also thinking about pizza dough, which you can punch. Physical cooking is really nice during times of crisis.

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I'm working on an Instant Pot pot roast. If I get really ambitious, maybe I'll make some drop biscuits to go with it.

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I'm going to make those biscuits later in the week! I have too many baked goods in the house right now (pi day pie and a loaf of soda bread), but once the soda bread is gone, it's biscuit time baby.

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I’m also simmering beans! Yesterday I finally made buffalo cauliflower “wings,” which I’d been meaning to try for ages.

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It is a wonderful book, but I made the mistake of re-reading Station Eleven and it made me super panicky. Last time I read it we weren't gearing up for the end of days D :

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Oh nooo I keep thinking about that damn book too. The mom I babysit for re-watched Contagion yesterday because she thought it would be funny/interesting/comforting and has expressed Some Regrets.

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Similarly, watching Contagion seemed like a reasonable decision on Tuesday, but now I kind of wish we hadn't...

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Aw jeez! Everything has a new and icky coat of possibility.

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I bought it a few months ago but it's sitting on my shelf and I'm scared to open it!

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please not Sick with a capital S

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We're not sure! She doesn't qualify for a test, so we're just keeping her home and treating her symptoms for now (none of which require a trip to the doctor). But if anything escalates, we plan on calling a nursing line and asking for further advice. It's not an ideal situation, but we're hoping it's just a seasonal cold/flu thing that will pass.

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

In case you hadn't seen before, please don't have Grace use anti-inflammatories! Tylenol all the way. https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/16/health/coronavirus-ibuprofen-french-health-minister-scn-intl-scli/index.html

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Thank you! Nicole told us that yesterday, which I'm so grateful for, because she had taken a single dose of ibuprofen, but we switched to Tylenol right after that one dose and will keep her off anti-flammatories for the foreseeable

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PROTECT GRACE AT ALL COSTS! I am ON IT.

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Even the CNN article, if you read it completely, says that there's not actually solid evidence contraindicating NSAIDs for COVID, beyond the normal cautions against their overuse.

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Work was closed all last week for a pre-scheduled break, not for Current Events reasons, and only on Sunday evening did they finally send word that we were all still coming back in today. And yet it only took until lunch for them to start surveying how good everyone's home internet is!

I now declare an Animal Crossing subthread. In 4 days I'm naming my island 'Found', I think!

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I have been trying to settle on an island name for weeks and I just know I will still spend hours on the naming screen when it launches 😖 very excited for the game though. I’ve been playing New Leaf to curb my impatience.

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Ooh, I couldn't go back to New Leaf at this point, knowing in advance how soon I'd be ditching my town again :X You're stronger than I am! Do you have a shortlist of names?

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Hmmm, maybe NoShoes because my island will be barefoot only. Or just Spookums. Because I like spooky things. Probably the spirit will move me on the day and I’ll pick something altogether different. ‘Found’ is very good. You got any Worst and Best Villagers?

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God, I love Spookums.

I never cared for Pietro in New Leaf. And someone else in WW, I forget who, gave me a nickname that spread to the whole town and I was basically never called by the name I picked ever again. Never forgave that guy. Savannah was my WW bestie, and Tammy in NL, but I'd rather meet new ones than try to get them back in this version.

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I LOVE Savannah! She’s so nice. I currently have Cyrano passing around the catchphrase ‘Assbutt’ to all the other villagers and really I only have myself to blame. 😑

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Get well soon, Grace! You two are a national treasure.

I'm watching scary movies to validate my feelings. "American Beauty" is a great argument against heterosexuality. Confinement to quarters means I don't have to worry about my gender presentation -- no more ironing shirts!

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I AM SO WITH YOU ABOUT AMERICAN BEAUTY. I remember being so relieved when I found out Linda Holmes thought it was heterosexist because all the other smart artists I knew of had loved it and I'd been worried my dislike of it meant I was unsmart.

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Thanks! I don't get why a movie with such cliche characters won all those awards. The wife is a shrewish caricature with no developed motivations. What I really want to see (are you listening, Danny?) is a "Rosenkrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead" version from the POV of the gay neighbors...two hours of Jim and Jim asking each other "are the straights okay?"

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I am just, really not doing well today? nightmares or whatever all last night and then my pup was too excited waking me up this morning and scratched my face. all of everything is making my anxiety/depression flare and it's all so bad and scary! and also apparently work is still a thing (very grateful to still be employed, but find it very hard to focus on work!).

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I'm so sorry to hear that. My cats have been super restless this week, I'm sure that animals can tell that there's something going on. It is hard and scary, but even though we are physically isolated, we're all here together. Focusing on work is tougggghh, but don't be hard on yourself, there are bigger things at hand. Practice some self-care, whatever that means to you, and I know that I (and others I'm sure) are thinking of you, and sending loving vibes.

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Thank you!!! I really appreciate your kind words. Sending loving vibes back at ya.

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Best wishes for Grace! Drink lots of water!

I have The Symptoms as well and and don't qualify for testing, so I'm doing a quarantine lite: working from home, watching The Americans, making sourdough.

Not a tankie until it comes to Keri Russell, then I am 100% a tankie.

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now seems like the perfect season to finally find out what a tankie is

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keep watching the sopranos, remain a patriot, america needs you

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Can I just say this kind of feels like the Toast comment boards again, but even better?

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I'm in the eye of the hurricane

I've been bedbound since Thanksgiving-ish, surgery was delayed since I did manage to get pregnant JUST before injury.... finally scheduled for this week and they havent canceled me yet. (All non-emergent surgeries canceled starting next week)

Pregnant and surgery was bad enough, now pandemic and a partner who had to go on influenza prophylaxis due to exposure at work and today has a patient getting Covid-tested...

I freaked out yesterday and today just feels like the calm before the storm.

I could really use some pumped-up strengthening songs for before surgery?

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surgery is scary even in the best of times! before my hysterectomy, singing along to some ABBA always picked me up, and I try to find the feel-good-est stuff to watch. I watched Julie & Julia this morning and it got my panic brain to shut it for a little bit.

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I've been doing a social media fast for Lent and yesterday I panicked and thought BUT HOW ARE GRACE AND DANNY? Thankful for this thread, and to know how you two are. My thoughts and heart are with you in this flu-era. My husband and I are both self-isolated with dry coughs and me with the other common symptom of the pandemic era: long-form, panicked weeping. One thing that's getting me through is imagining the massive bonfire I'm going to have when this is all over of every post-apocalyptic pandemic media I've consumed leading up to this moment which is maybe everything I've ever consumed. Sorry dystopian YA lit, it's over.

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Does anyone know of any financial resources for substitute teachers who are going to be out of work for the next few months? We’re non union so we don’t get anything for all this time we can’t work and idk what to do about my bills/loans/groceries. I just know I have to stay in because of my asthma so I can’t even really look for another job. If anyone can send things my way I’d really appreciate it!

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I've found ploughing my anxious energy into mutual aid efforts has made things feel a bit more tolerable. Sort of. For UK people, there's a list of mutual aid groups at https://covidmutualaid.org/ and good guidance from QueerCare at https://queercare.network/.

Sending love and solidarity all round x

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I had ankle surgery last monday, so I was expected to be sitting around the house for the next month, but dang, certainly not in these circumstances. So grateful for my partners being willing to come by and get things off of high shelves for me. Been doing a lot of knitting, and trying to organize a little mutual aid network locally (in Pittsburgh)

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Any suggestions on short things to read/watch? My day (and now just all the time job) involves the *gestures around* so I’m having trouble focusing for long but my brain needs a break.

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Danny's new book is pretty good :)

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The audiobook literally just came from my library. 💙💜

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NPR Tiny Desk concerts always make me feel better/give me a liiiiiittle break

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Schitt's Creek!!

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I love it so much and am behind - thank you for reminding me.

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Taskmaster on youtube is light and ridiculous, obviously the Bon Appetit vids and Adam Savage one day builds, we have also found Juns Kitchen calming.

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I extremely second Taskmaster!

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I have been re-reading Calvin and Hobbes collections. They make me belly laugh so hard my partner comes to check on me because it sounds like I'm sobbing or throwing up. 12/10 would recommend.

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The Bon Appetit cooking videos (on YouTube) are hugely charming, and mostly in the range of 15-30 minutes.

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I got a bunch of supplies (*just one thing of soap and no loo roll) this weekend, planning to self-isolate for two weeks, and then started with a fever Sunday night. My boomer parents, who I was with on Sunday, WENT INTO WORK TODAY. Dad’s only just gone home now, at lunch. I’m so angry with them and myself and also fairly frightened!

I also forgot to get milk and now can’t get any. That’s a whinge more than a worry.

Has anyone else got re-addicted to a silly phone game? Angry Birds 2 is mine rn.

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Hey, there's only so much you can do. My mom is hosting dinner parties and kept going to work until she couldn't anymore. She doesn't want to accept that she's at risk. It's not your fault - and absolutely not your fault for getting sick. Just keep doing what you can and encouraging them to stay at home.

I'm really into Two Dots right now!! It does have microtransactions but it's really quite easy to play - and still fun too! - without buying anything. Also planning on re-downloading Design Home which I used to play on the toilet every damn day.

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Design Home! Perfect.

Thank you for talking me down from my wobble. I’m immunocompromised anyway (not much, just coeliac disease, and I’m young) So I’m hopeful I won’t end up in hospital.

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Oh, I started Candy Crush, so distracting

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I just discovered that one of the local farms does old-fashioned milk delivery, so I'm really excited about that, but I know this is more of a midwest benefit and not available to most.

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Wiz Khalifa's Weed Farm! It's actually really good?

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re: phone games – just redownloaded Draw Something and made all my friends get it and it is extremely calming tbh!

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I finally bit the bullet and ordered the overpriced, but convenient (as you only need like a few vegetables I already have on hand) Cassoulet kit from D'artangan. I figured i might as well self-quarantine in style.

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I'd like to make some donations to aid funds, particularly for service workers who have lost jobs/shifts--does anyone know if/where these have been set up?

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author

There's a Service Workers' Coalition in Brooklyn my friend Harron told me about -- https://www.instagram.com/p/B9pkrHkhdyq/?igshid=fldsqmdg0h7m

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you can also email serviceworkerscoalition@gmail.com for more specific instructions

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Amazing--thank you so much!

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This google doc links to a bunch of them, including ones specifically for artists, sex workers, and BIPOC LGBTQIA+ folks. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Rcan4C_e6OBFBI5bUn7MtYK74Ab-WarxyJmDvZUI_YA

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

This is an INCREDIBLE resource, thank you so much

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Find a local food bank in your area, they will definitely find a good use for the $

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Your closest city may have a community foundation, check there. Here is DC's for example: https://www.thecommunityfoundation.org/

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A friend is isolating due to probable Covid; he can’t get a test. It seems mild, he’s young and healthy, we’re praying for the best. When I asked how I could help him, he requested a list of favorite Toast links, because he wasn’t very online when the Toast was and didn’t know where to start. He’s probably spending quality time with Two Monks today.

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I'm self-employed. A writer. Mostly on Facebook, really. In this weird little spiritual niche where virtually ALL of my income is donation based, sort of like Patreon except my patrons directly give instead of through a platform. Anyway... It's been intense. Because I'm also trying to buy my house for $4000 and started a fundraiser for it *just* before shit hit the fan. I'm halfway there, but so far, the county organization I'm buying the house from is not budging on wanting to close by the end of this month, even though there's a global pandemic going on.

I'm a hermit, though, so really, this is just how my life always is. Stay at home. Social distancing is my way of life. By design. I post on Facebook all day long, do my weekly Service days, and my audience donates what they can when they can. It's not a lot, but usually, it's just enough, just in time.

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Just got home from a full day working in a community health clinic in NYC. Trying to balance my sudden position as a frontline responder in an epidemic with my status as high-risk due to a bunch of chronic medical issues. Very thankful to have work and to be helping in crisis, but living in an excruciating limbo of anxiety waiting for the inevitable shoe-drop of contracting. Having to wake up every morning and expose myself again has filled me with a kind of sustained dread I’ve never experienced before, and I’m struggling to find ways to process it. Anyone with experience with working in high-stress/crisis environments have advice for getting through those days and taking care once they’re over?

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I was sick for almost two weeks — upper respiratory but who knows? I felt so awful the only thing that I was capable of watching was Law &Order. Then I realized I could watch Law & Order UK (hurray!) on the Sundance channel via Amazon Prime. It was great — no thinking, always a guaranteed resolution, and a lot of Jamie Bamber. What more can you ask for when you feel like crap. Now I'm in quarantine again because I have children home from college and we're rewatching all of Community. Oh! And Dirk Gently, the ultimate in comfort-watching..

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Thank you for this. I'm a video game person myself. Anyone else?

I've been playing a lot of Destiny 2, but I might switch over to Stardew Valley for some wholesome farming goodness.

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I burned myself out on Stardew Valley unfortunately :( It started to make me feel bad to play it by myself, which never happened with other games. Especially in winter. One of those daily bgm's is pure life-questioning juice.

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I’m a low-level full timer at an entertainment venue in my Medium Sized Anonymous City. We should close, bc...public health/community solidarity/what we owe to one another. We have not closed, bc...money. I’m continuing to work (remotely when possible) so that I can survive financially (I am 23 and poor), but I feel so deeply gross about it.

That all being confessed, I am delighted by this open thread. Is anyone else consoling themselves with the earnest theatre teens on the sunshine songs hashtag? Highly recommend.

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Hope you two are well! My high school’s classes will most likely be cancelled for the next 2 months and it’s really uprooted my idea of the future. I do feel more mentally prepared for the revolution now — institutions crumbling seems like something I’ll see more of. Any essential reading for a young and deeply embarrassed transmasc slash communist?

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Mar 16, 2020Liked by Daniel Lavery

If you're having feelings about classes being cancelled, I'd go for Paulo Freire, Pedagogy of the Oppressed!

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